“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way.
So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”
I’m a post-modern vegetarian: I eat meat – ironically.
“Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that’s how dogs spend their lives.”
“I like to play chess with bald men in the park, although it’s hard to find 32 of them.”